Sunday, December 15, 2019
Silent Suffering â⬠A short Story Free Essays
In the beginning, the job of an obesity councillor had its perks, I must admit. I used to crave the enjoyment I received from helping someone who needed me, but I never thought that helping myself would be my downfall. My wife, she hates me, I can see it in her eyes every time she dares to look my way. We will write a custom essay sample on Silent Suffering ââ¬â A short Story or any similar topic only for you Order Now And my children, what use am I to them now? Too fat to even kick a ball! A little support from her wouldnââ¬â¢t go amiss I reckon, but of course she has a life of her own. I used to be happy, we used to be happy. Then everything changed. My job was everything to me, but how can a fat pig of a man like me show any kind of encouragement for his patients? I think it happened when my father died, we were close me and him. I took four weeks off from work, the wife was away on business and the kids stopped with her parents. All I could do was eat, I thought it would go away, but even now, almost two years later food is all I think about. I suppose the fact I recognise what Iââ¬â¢m doing is a starting point, but what have I got to live for now? I really canââ¬â¢t see my marriage making it to the end of the year, theyââ¬â¢ll take the kids off me, Iââ¬â¢m sure. What kind of a dad can I be? Theyââ¬â¢ll say Iââ¬â¢m mad, theyââ¬â¢re probably right too. Look at me! So desperate for someone to talk to that I have talk to the ugly thing staring back in the mirror! Councillor heal thyself comes to mind doesnââ¬â¢t it? It never works you know, bottling things up. It only leads to unhappiness. But when youââ¬â¢re unhappy anyway thereââ¬â¢s not really a difference. Sometimes I just want to end it; itââ¬â¢s like a physical pain, burning in my chest. Iââ¬â¢ve planned it you know, Iââ¬â¢m scared of course, thatââ¬â¢s why I keep putting it off. Fat coward! Yesterday at work, suicide seemed inevitable once again. For 15 years Iââ¬â¢ve sat at my desk listening to the depressed stories of people like me. Can you imagine what that does to a man? My whole working career has been spent in a cell of depression and my professional mind is telling me itââ¬â¢s definitely taken its toll! I remember my daughterââ¬â¢s sports day a few months ago. She dragged me up for the parentsââ¬â¢ race, I tried to refuse but she wouldnââ¬â¢t let me. The whistle blew and away we went. Other dads racing like ruddy hares and then there was me, huffing and puffing at the back. I didnââ¬â¢t even cross the line before I collapsed in a heap, pains tearing through my chest. Teachers rushing around, determined to phone for an ambulance but I wouldnââ¬â¢t have it. I looked up; my wife stood in the distance a scowl on her face as usual. She said later that it served me right, practically calling me a greedy pig in the process! Sheââ¬â¢s right though, as always. You see, what can a man like me give to the world? Iââ¬â¢m just another statistic, another middle aged man with no life. Fat and ugly, thatââ¬â¢s all I am! All I need is some pills; I know we have plenty around the house. Just enough to do the job. Iââ¬â¢ll take them before I sleep, that way Iââ¬â¢ll never feel it, just go to sleep and never wake up. Sheââ¬â¢ll be happy, I know it. Free to be with the fancy man I know she has! My eyes are closed now, it wonââ¬â¢t be long. I left a note in the kitchen telling my kids that I love them. I didnââ¬â¢t say anything about the wife mind you. I used to be a good man, with a purpose! How did I come to be this? How to cite Silent Suffering ââ¬â A short Story, Papers
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